How should I feel? what should I do? personal Q (long) any advice appreciated.?

I just moved from China to Japan in order to be with my boyfriend of 4 years. Upon my arrival I found out he was offerred a really good job in Shanghai, and he fully intends to move to China in a month....Our original plan was that once I got to Japan we would figure out what to do, or basically which country offerred us the best opportunities (Japan or America) and then go on from there. China was never an option as I just spent the past year there and hated every minute of it, and he knows that, so he said even if I wanted to accompany him to Shanghai he wouldnt let me. His work in Shanghai will be completed in a year and he says we can be together after that..





So basically, he is saying that we cant spend the next year together and I have to go back to America and he to China.





Am I crazy in thinking that he;s being selfish? Am I the one being selfish in thinking he should turn down this opportunity (btw, he was rejected by over 140 japanese companies)?How should I feel? what should I do? personal Q (long) any advice appreciated.?
I don't think he's being selfish...in fact, quite the opposite...he is trying to look out for you because he thinks that you won't like it in China again, so he doesn't want to put you through that again.....and p.s., no I don't think he should turn it down, he needs to follow his career path....but anyway, with that being said, you need to dig deep down inside yourself and figure out why you disliked China and see if you can maybe change some things and go back there and enjoy it this time....if you can't see yourself back there no matter what, then the solution is simple....you go to where you are happy and you come visit him in China for a couple of weeks here and there.....you have extended visits so you two can have a good amount of time together, but youre not living there...Also, if you have to do long distance for a little bit, then take it as a chance to grow closer...with modern technology now a days you can e-mail, instant message, text message, write real letters, phone calls, web cams, etc. etc. and be in constant communication with each other...who knows, it might even make you two grow closer in the long run...so my best advice I can give you is that you BOTH need to be happy and come to a compromise so that one day you two can settle in a spot where you both truly want to live. For now, you need to come to a happy compromise, support his decision, be there for him, and at the same time, make yourself happy...you have some decisions to make...best of luck!!How should I feel? what should I do? personal Q (long) any advice appreciated.?
If what you say is true that he was rejected by over 140 Japanese companies, you would ask him to take the job opportunity in Shanghai. And maybe what he said is true, that you should move back to America. It's only 1 year, and if it's long distance relationship, you can also see whether he's faitfull to you or not.
THE BEST advice i have for you is to DO you, altering your world to suite the needs of another will never and can never fufill YOU. AND YOU are your own top priority. end of story. NO one wants someone they can just control, dont be his toy, that he can just make do whatever he wants. Be happy, live your life. Were born alone and will die alone, dont waste one more second living for someone else
considering the fact that he was rejected by 140 companies....i think u should let him go to china and begin his career.


you can go with him if you don't have any serious issue with china.


otherwise u can keep seeing each other frequently.
I think you should read the book,';He's just not that into you';.


You have got to develop your own life and ESPECIALLY your own back bone! Try taking a course in ';Womens Studies';. You are free! Girl wake up! If you do not currently drink coffee start today, shake those cobwebs out of your head and develop your voice!!!!!! Mother loves you!