Personal statement, some advice please?

this is my personal statement for a diploma course in teaching. please give me honest feedback on what i should change/improve and what you feel i should add im a bit stuck. please not the .... part is where i will either be entering bsl or makaton as i want to take a sign language course but im not sure what age makaton fades out and bsl begins so i need to find out which one would be better for me to learn. many thanks





I still remember my favourite primary school teacher nearly 14 years on. I would like to think that in 30 years time a child I have taught will say the same about me. A good teacher has the ability to change lives, to show you the ability in yourself you never knew you had and to install you with self confidence and belief. You have asked me to tell you why I want to be a teacher, I could give you many reasons but the main reason for me is that when you love a job it stops becoming work.


I have previously worked with children in nursery setting and have an nvq2 in childcare. I now work as a carer for an agency mainly doing home visits so the range of experience is amazing. However saying that, unfortunately there is very little progression career wise and mainly working with palliative patients it can be very emotionally draining, which is why i feel a career in teaching would be much more beneficial.


I am also applying for a part time course in.... so I will have a wider variety of skills and maybe go on to specialise in working with special needs.Personal statement, some advice please?
I think overall content is excellent but I'd raise an eyebrow at the part where you've put ';...which is why I feel a career in teaching would be much more beneficial';. In the context it's in, I'd make an assumption that you find working with palliative care patients difficult because of the emotional connotations and yet teaching can be very emotional too, and would you struggle to cope with that? I'm not suggesting you would struggle, I'm only suggesting that's how it may be perceived?





I would be delighted if my son was taught by a teacher that he respected, thrived under and remembered for a long time. Sadly he has had only one teacher that made a lasting impression on him for the right reasons.





The part where you put that when you love a job it stops becoming work, I think that's a delightful phrase! Wishing you all the best :)